Here's a question: when is it appropriate to "come out of the closet" and declare yourself a vegan? The answer depends on you.
I think people assume that just because you're vegan all your friends are, or you live in a little vegan community or something. I think this is funny because aside from my sister and two of my friends, I don't personally know any other vegans, so I don't know what the experiences of others have been.
Here's what mine has been.
As I've said before, I initially tried out a plant based diet, that wasn't entirely vegan all of the time, during my second pregnancy. I did this because I felt it imperative for my health and the health of my baby (thanks to the constant encouragement of my midwives).
I was glad I had an excuse to use when I told people I wasn't eating meat because I wanted to avoid high blood pressure during my pregnancy. It was a great cloak to hide behind, especially because I was really self-concious and didn't want people to badger, lecture, or tell me what I was doing was weird, wrong, crazy. And during much of this time I wasn't entirely sure I wanted to be vegan for life. I wasn't sure I could make that commitment, as it seemed to be, at the time.
As time progressed and I naturally transitioned my mind, body, and spirit towards a more holstic approach to diet, I realized that I loved the way I felt. I mean, I felt alive. And vibrant, and confident. Not only about my food choices, but these feelings of empowerment really transcended over to other aspects of my life.
It's hard to know exactly when I decided that I wanted to be vegan. I had told people it was just the diet I was on during the pregnancy, but just before I had my second child (about 2 weeks before), I realized I needed to get off the fence and make a decision. And at this point I had too much knowledge. Theoritically (I had read The China Study, Sugar Blues, and Mad Cowboy and did quite a bit of research online) and practically (for nearly 6 or 7 months my diet had been a gradual progression to a purely vegan diet). My mind knew and my body knew what was right.
Yet I was still scared to declare anything. Partly because I was afraid I would go back to being an omnivore, and I felt that saying something like, "I'm vegan" was very different than "I eat a vegan diet" or "I try to eat a vegan diet." The second suggests some partiality and deviation based on whims and feelings or social situations while the first means long-term commitment, a sort of declaration of a certain philosophy of life.
So about 2 weeks after I had my baby, I remember being apart from my husband and calling him on the phone to tell him that I was vegan. He said, "Yah, I know." I replied, "No really, I mean it. I'm going to be vegan and I'm going to tell people that." From that point on, I was vegan. I decided I wouldn't make any exceptions deliberately. So no butter in my cookies, or eggs in my cake. Here are a few observations I've had since then.
The first year of declaring my veganness were the most difficult for me simply because everything was so new, and to use a phrase of a fellow blogger, I felt like a "poser." I mean, I didn't have all the answers (and I still don't) but I felt like people expected me to. And I always felt slightly awkward going over to friends or families houses and having to explain my new way of eating. Not just for myself but for my children as well (which gets even trickier especially as well meaning individuals like to give "non-kosher" treats like cheese and cupcakes and ice cream at every turn).
So I sort of stumbled my way through, learning lessons along the way. Like, it's much better to be up front and clear. And don't be so serious. Have a sense of humor and lightness about it, especially when people are clearly defensive. I have to admit this was the hardest for me personally to take, because I naturally want to get defensive, especially about the choices I make. And I felt like at every gathering I had to defend my new food choices. But really, turns out, most people are just curious. And I would have to say that the harshest critics tend to be family. Now, I'm very grateful to say that for the most part, my extended family is supportive and if nothing else, just polite about me and my kids being vegan.
I cannot deny that I felt social and familial pressures to conform. I mean, I was really concerned with what others thought of me, how I would have to constantly defend myself and the choices I was making for my family, and how I might be different from everyone else. These are all very valid and real concerns. That said, it's interesting now, to look back and see how all of these concerns seemed huge and important to me at the time, but now are seemingly insignificant. It's hard to believe that I almost let my perception of what other people might think of me affect some of the most crucial factors in my health and happiness as well as that of my family.
Now that I have a couple of years under my belt, I usually don't have a second thought about the way I eat. I mean, this is the way that I eat and the way my kids eat. It's normal for us. It's like looking at someone who is a marathon runner and saying, "How do you do it? I mean isn't it so weird that you run that much? That must be so hard and you're so disciplined, ect." Obviously to that runner it's not weird. They enjoy it, and it might take some discipline, but they're probably pretty good at running by now that they don't put to much thought into getting up every day and doing it. They love the way it makes them feel, they know the benefits, and like most uber-runners, they couldn't see their lives without it.
Another thing. I didn't initially become vegan because of animal rights or environmental reasons. I did it for me, as selfish as that sounds. Over time, however, I have seen the truth behind what factory farming is really like (obscene, to say the least, watch this if you don't believe me) as well as come to believe that our bodies are not nutritionally dependent upon animals so why cause unnecessary suffering and cruelty? I've said this before, if we all were forced to slaughter all of the meat we consumed, this world would have a lot more vegetarians. And as for the environmental reasons, I think they are equally compelling, but still not the primary reason why I am vegan.
I cannot imagine what my life would be like had I not made the decision to become vegan, but I can take a few guesses. I'd be 40 lbs. heavier than I am now. I'd probably spend more time being sick; have less time to devote to those things that I enjoy in life like my family, friends, and church activities; have less energy and confidence; experience a myriad of unwanted symptoms like bloating, constipation, indigestion, sluggishness, ect. In short, my life would be very different than what it is now.
So if you're considering implementing a vegan diet, no worries. You don't have to "declare" anything right now. Just move in a more healthful and compassionate direction of eating and living, going at the pace that your mind and body are willing to go. When the time is right, after experience and educating yourself, you'll know. Just give it a chance, and it will all work out.
Fantastic post. When I tell friends that I made a "vegan dinner" and it was good, the next question is, "are you going vegan". I totally feel like how you described during your pregnancy. I do feel like a poser because if there is butter in the butter dish, I put it on my bread. If a recipe calls for an egg, I put it in.
ReplyDeleteAnd I feel like I'm moving towards a healthier me and I like it. I don't feel like I can completely do it yet though and here's why: I still feel like I don't know enough. I don't know what nutrients I'll be deficient in, I don't really know how to feed my daughter the appropriate diet as a vegan (ha! let alone in general... the kid is picky) and so I keep reading and learning until I feel confident in answering the more important questions. It's funny though... I don't want Ella drinking milk or eating meat. Ha!
Abbie, I was in a very similar situation. I was scared if I didn't give my kid's milk they wouldn't grow properly.
ReplyDeleteWhy do people say we need animal products? For meat it's the iron and protein, maybe a few more nutrients like zinc? And milk, dairy products? The claim is that we need it for calcium, protein, and vitamin D.
It's critical to understand this: you can get everything from plants that you can get from animals, with the exception of B-12. And plants are a better source as they contain fiber (which we all need more of) and none of the cholesterol, casein or animal protein (which is linked to many cancers), or saturated fats. I won't get into the discussion here about B-12, Dr. Campbell talks a lot about it in his book, but you can read about it in many other books. Anyway, the need for this nutrient is very small (about 5 mcg a day) so taking a supplement for this is more than sufficient.
Animal foods have absolutely NO FIBER, which is critical for proper waste elimination among other things. Also, animal products contain so a many damaging carcinogens: hormones, antibiotics, pesticides (much much higher in animal products than plant products), saturated fat, cholesterol, to name a few. So why would you consume a product that contains so many negative things when you could get the very same nutrients from foods that have don't have these unwanted, icky attributes?
Our need for protein is 5% of our caloric intake. The RDA is set at 10% (double our need to act as a buffer). That's about 40 grams of protein, on a 2000 calorie diet. It's virtually impossible not to meet your protein needs. Only way to do that is not get enough calories or eat a diet primarily made up of refined sugar and oil. It kills me when people say, "gotta get your protein, gotta get your protein." We're all obsessed with protein, and it's really doing us no good.
As for dairy products, it seems fairly illogical to me to say that we must breastfeed our children, then once we ween them give them milk from a cow, milk that was clearly intended to nourish a baby calf...Am I the only one to see this connection? It really makes no sense at all to me. Really do some research on what goes into milk, besides milk, and it's rather scary.... And consider that more than half the world's population does not drink milk. And as a whole, they do not suffer from things we associate with lack of milk-drinking like osteoperosis (there's a much better association with high-protein in the diet than lack of calcium, only one of the dozens of nutrients our body needs). Where do you think hippos and elephants (vegetarian mammals who don't drink cow's milk) get their calcium to grow big and strong?? From plants. That's exactly where we should get our nourishment, not just calcium (I've realized this isolation of nutrients is a marketing tactic used by many industries, especially the dairy industry...get your calcium, get your calcium, drink milk, drink milk, they say). Anyway, you're doing great Abbie. Know you're not alone, just keep educating yourself, keep an open mind, and the rest will follow.
Vitamin D, btw, comes from sunshine. Our body processes it from being out in the sun. Vitamin D is artifically put into cow's milk. It does not occur naturally.
ReplyDeleteOne last thing. I've heard people say, "Oh you have to carefully plan a vegetarian/vegan diet to make sure you're getting all of the nutrients you need." It's actually not difficult. What's difficult is eating the SAD (standard American Diet) and trying to get all the nutrients you need. If you're eating meat and dairy you've got iron (which is cancelled out by the dairy which tends to block iron absorption), calcium (which is mostly lost through the urine on high-protein diets because it acts as a buffer), and protein. But what about phytochemicals, antioxidants, vitamin C, fiber, ect.? None of these exist in animal foods or refined sugars and oils.
ReplyDeleteA plant-based diet isn't hard. Just eat a variety of grains, legumes, fruits, and vegetables each day. It's as simple as that.
opps! I stated that for a 2000 calorie diet, 10% of calories should come from protein which is 40 grams. I should have said 50 grams (4 calories/gram of protein X 50 grams= 200 calories, which is 10% of 2000).
ReplyDeleteWow, really helpful post.
ReplyDeleteAfter breastfeeding your children did you give them any other type of milk, such as almond, rice, etc.?
Joyful homemaker: I did give my boys non-dairy milk, but not excessively. I stopped nursing at 12 months and 14 months respectively and was a little sad about it because I knew their little bodies should still be having my milk. However, due to pregnancy I stopped nursing when I was 6 months pregnant both times (I think my milk started tasting bitter, or something, because I did have milk, but they just weaned themselves). I do believe that nursing beyond 12 months is really great for the baby and I would like to nurse my current little one until she's 18 months or longer. I think babies were meant to nurse until at least the age of 2, but as a culture we've moved really far away from this idea, which I think is unfortunate. Between 12 months and 2 years of age is one of the more challenging times to feed your child, especially if he/she is weened because at this age they still require a high amount of fat (breastmilk is about 50%) and cow's is not really a good option (for reasons stated previously) because it's much higher in protein and the nutrient ratios are much more suited to that of a growing calf, not a growing human. So in answer to your question, yes I gave and still give my kids non-dairy milk, but I didn't give it to them in a bottle and mostly it was for a snack once or twice a day. Green smoothies with added flaxseed oil or avacados are also great to give to kids at this age (but you have to watch out for allergies). Homemade almond and rice milks are much better than the store bought stuff, and the value of soy milk has been hotly debated, so keep that in mind. Nothing compares to human milk in terms of the perfect ratios for what a growing infant needs.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for the quick reply. Would you mind sharing your recipe for homemade almond milk, I have been purchasing it and it is quite expensive!
ReplyDeleteAlso, I know you have mentioned this previuosly, but what blender do you use. Vita Mix, right? I use a regular old blender which seems to serve its purpose. My questions are do you feel that it is a worthwhile investment, is there really THAT big of a difference in a higher quality blender, and do you grind your wheat in you blender.
Joyful homemaker: I will post my recipes for almond, cashew, and rice milk, all easily made in a blender, give me a day or two, and they'll be up. As far as a blender goes, YES, it does matter if you have a good blender. If my house were burning down, aside from children and husband, I would make sure I grabbed my blender. I just couldn't live without it. I use it to make flours, dips, sauces, syrups, soup, smoothies, ice cream, whole juices. I've had my current Blend-Tech for nearly 9 months and have used it about 1400 times (it tells you how many times you have used it). I have a 7 year warranty (I purchased mine from Costco) so it's covered for a few more years. Vita-Mix blenders are also a good way to go....now that I'm on the subject, I really should just do a post on this...
ReplyDeleteWow, thanks for all the info!! I feel like I have a mega problem at the moment because these are the things Ella will eat:
ReplyDeleteCream of Wheat (whole wheat)
Whole wheat English Muffins
Mashed beans (black, navy, pinto, etc.)
Cheese
Avacado
Tomatoes
I kid you not, I have tried bananas, apples, grapefruit (she liked this one day but not any others)carrots, green beans, juice, etc. She doesn't like cows milk straight nor does she like juice. So I feel like she's not getting any of her Vitamins C or anything else healthy she gets from fruits.
She LOVES cheese and I worry about taking it out right now because it is seriously one of the few things she will eat.
I am expanding our diet with lots of yummy things from Dr. mcDougall's cookbook but I still feel like I know so little. It's almost frustrating because I feel like I have so much to learn before I can really do it! But I'm making baby steps and like I said earlier, I feel great. Still need some improvements though. :)
Abbie, Dreena Burton has a great cookbook that has a kid section on how/what to feed toddlers...don't get too strung up about it. Just offer her different foods, and she will eat if she's hungry. I completely know the frustration, believe me.
ReplyDeleteIt's called Vive le Vegan.
ReplyDelete